Our Loving Patron of All Authors, Metatron
by lexieconextreme
Summary: The boys bring Metatron to Storybrooke so Emma can look after him, and have an interesting talk with a young fan. one-shot


**A/N: It's midnight and I'm exhausted, so leave me alone.**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural, Once Upon a Time, or any of the characters within. Wait, I own Lily.**

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Sam and Dean were rolling into the ever-so-lovely town of Storybrooke. The boys and Emma were old friends, having met on several different occasions. All three traveled everywhere, and with all the everywhere there was in this country, apparently there wasn't enough to not meet each other again and again.

Each and every time Emma has met the boys, she's also met some monster to add to her list of Things That Tried to Kill Me Today. But when she received Dean's phone call, she knew she was about to meet something bad, yet again.

The way Dean explained it to her, there was more than just the monsters that went bump in the night. There were demons, and the whole point of Dean calling Emma, angels.

Emma wasn't religious, and told Dean so, but he just laughed. "So am I!" but he then covered it up hastily with a cough. "Sorry, Cas is looking at me like he's pissed."

"Who's Cas?" Emma asked, amused. "Oh he's an angel that rebelled for my family." Dean replied quickly, then he yelped. "Sorry Emma, I mean he rebelled for _me_. Castiel is an angel that rebelled for me, apparently."

Huh. "Well," Emma said. "At least you can't pretend like you aren't flattered. I mean, rebelling against Heaven, God, and all those angels? That can't have been easy."

"Yeah...I suppose not."

"So...who exactly is Cas to you?" Emma asked, enjoying the teasing.

Emma heard Sam interrupt, and she figured she must be on speakerphone. "Cas is Dean's _boyfriend_!" Sam was laughing hard, which earned him a quiet " _bitch"_. Sam was quick to reply, "Jerk."

Emma laughed quietly. Dean had a boyfriend, then. Who knew?

"Why are you guys calling me, again? I lost track after we started talking about Dean's love life."

Sam snorted, then answered "We have a bit of a problem with one of the angels, Metatron. He-"

"He's a massive dick, is what he is," Dean interrupted angrily. Emma's eyebrows rose. "So again. Why are you calling me?"

Sam sighed. "We were hoping you would let us keep him in Storybrooke for a little while. Just until he figures out that no matter how much power he has, he still can't be God."

"He tried to be God?" Emma asked skeptically.

"Yeah, it's difficult to explain. If you let us come, I'll explain it when we get there."

Emma sighed, thinking. "Can I call you back? I need to talk to a couple people first."

"We'll be here," Dean said, ending the call.

Emma went to find her parents, Henry, and Regina. They all agreed that Sam and Dean could come to Storybrooke, as long as the boys didn't stir up any trouble. "That's unlikely," Emma muttered, walking away to call Sam and Dean back.

A few days after that, Dean and Sam were sitting outside the barrier in their Impala, waiting for Emma to give them a way in.

Emma tossed out the scroll that allowed people to see Storybrooke, and Dean quickly got out and grabbed it. He got back in, showing it to Sam. They looked up, and upon seeing Emma, waved and grinned. She beckoned them inside, and got in her yellow bug.

Emma led the Winchester brothers through town to the jail. When they arrived, they got out and went inside to inspect the cell Metatron was to be put in.

As she walked in behind them, something crossed Emma's mind. "Hey guys! Where is this Metatron? He isn't with you."

Dean simply grinned at her while he and Sam started drawing symbols on the walls and bars. "Wait...you didn't." Emma looked at them dead serious, and Dean's grin grew wider. " _You put him in the trunk!_ "

Dean turned to her, laughing lightly. "Well it's not like there isn't enough room. You have seen the trunk space of a '67 Impala, right? There is a _huge_ amount of it!"

Emma shook her head, turning to Sam. "What _are_ you drawing?"

"They're symbols. Sigils that will keep Metatron from being able to communicate with the other angels, or escape."

Emma nodded. They'd often needed to find compatible prisons for other monsters she herself had encountered.

"So let me get this straight." Dean said, interrupting Emma's thoughts.

"Your parents are Snow White and Prince Charming, your son's father is the son of Rumplestiltskin, son of Peter Pan. Snow White's father married Regina, making her your mother's step-mother, and your step-grandmother. But Regina also adopted Henry, making him the adoptive mother of your son. And then Belle from _Beauty and the Beast_ comes along, and ends up being the true love of Rumplestiltskin, making Belle Henry's step-grandmother. Then, we have Zelena-the Wicked Witch of the West, who is Regina's half-sister. Regina's true love is none other than Robin Hood. And to get revenge for past wrongs, Zelena decided to disguise herself as Robin's ex-wife Maid Marian, and got pregnant with his child. But then Zelena turned out to be the true love of Hades, the blue-fire-hair dude from the Disney movie Hercules, who your mother happens to be good friends with. Hades kills Robin, permanently. And then Hades is killed by Zelena. Did I get all this right?"

Emma had in fact been struggling to keep up with her own personal and family history, and failed. But it sounded about right, so she just nodded.

"Jesus. And I thought my family was fucked up." Seeing Sam's look, he said "Dude, you know we have issues, and there's no point in denying it." Sam rolled his eyes.

Suddenly, Dean turned back to her with the biggest grin. "Oh, dude, I missed something!" Emma looked at him. "What could you _possibly_ have forgotten?"

"You're dating Captain Hook!" Dean was almost in tears, laughing.

Emma looked at him coolly before responding, "Yeah, and you're dating an angel. What's your point?"

That shut him up real quick. Then a new voice entered. "And just what's so wrong with dating Captain Hook?" An indignant voice asked. In walked the man himself, looking at the Winchester's curiously.

Dean said "Nothing. But the Disney version of you is not as fun to look at." And he went back to helping Sam with the sigils, while Emma snorted. "Dating that male angel really has affected you, hasn't it, Dean?"

Dean turned bright red, satisfying Emma of her revenge. The rest of Emma's family walked in, Henry talking with a friend from school who Emma recognised.

"Hi," she said kindly. "Lily, right?" The girl nodded. "Emma?" Emma offered her hand, "That's me!"

Henry started talking. "You already met my other mom, and my grandparents. Well, not all of my grandparents. I have a lot of those, but they're not all here, so it doesn't matter." Henry ignored Lily's expression of hilarity. "But I don't know you two."

"Oh," Emma said. "Guys, this is Sam and Dean Winchester, the ones I was asking if they could come here and hold their prisoner here." Emma started introducing everybody.

"Sam, Dean, this is my mom, Snow White, and her husband David. This is Regina, Zelena, and my son Henry. And this is my boyfriend, who you both can just call Hook."

Sam and Dean nodded politely. "Well," Sam said. "I think we're done. I'll just go get Metatron." Sam walked out of the room, followed by David who had a few questions.

Henry and Lily went back to talking about writing. "You're an author too?" Emma asked.

She nodded. "I don't really have anything original, though. It's mainly just fanfiction."

Emma smiled, and Henry said "It's still great that you're writing, though. You like it, don't you?" Lily nodded, smiling. "Good. Then just keep on writing."

Dean looked at Lily. "Fanfiction, huh? Write for anything interesting?"

Lily tilted her head, thinking. "Well, I write for a few shows and books that I like. NCIS, Doctor Who, Sherlock, Fullmetal Alchemist. The book series that I primarily write for is called _Supernatural_.

Dean sighed irritatedly, looking away. "I wish we could just get rid of those damn books," he muttered. "Why?" Zelena asked. "What does it have to do with you?"

Dean looked at her, tired. "Only everything. Those books were written about me and my brother, and every single experience we've had since I got Sammy's girlfriend killed."

Sam, coming back with Metatron and David, said "Dean, we've talked about this. Jess's death was not your fault. Don't blame yourself, blame the guy who hung her on the ceiling and burned her alive. But never blame yourself." Sam pushed a resisting Metatron into the cell. "And besides, Jess died over ten years ago. You can't keep beating yourself up about it." Sam looked deep into his brother's eyes.

The moment was ruined when Lily decided to interject with "Awww, a broment. I've always wanted to see one of these things for real, and not just read about them. But you two do this crap all the time, don't you?"

Dean decided to ignore the crazy girl and pull the gag out of Metatron's mouth, which admittedly, was probably not the best idea.

Metatron glared at Dean, then looked past him as Dean shut the cell door, locking it. The former angel smirked. "An angel, two Winchesters, five faerie tale characters, and three random people walk into a police station. Sounds like the beginning of a bad joke."

"I suppose that makes you the punch line, doesn't it?" Lily asked.

Metatron scowled at her, while Dean gave her the highest of fives.

"Anyway, did I hear you guys talking about Supernatural earlier? That was a crappy book series, to say the least." Dean shook a finger at him. "You sure you wanna insult Chuck's books like that? I'm sure he can hear you, you know." Metatron looked around, as if he were afraid Chuck would strike him down where he stood.

Lily had been looking at Metatron interestedly. "You're Metatron, right? The Celestial Scribe?"

Metatron looked at her wearily. "Yeah. Why?"

"Just wondering."

"Girl, if you were just wondering, you could have asked anyone. But you asked me. I am the patron of all authors. You don't just get to speak to me like I'm a simple human. And-WHAT?!"

Lily was laughing. "Did you hear that, Henry? He's our patron!" Henry laughed too, unable to hold back.

Metatron looked at them in confusion. "You're both writers?"

"Mmmhm," Henry said. "He's got magical Authorial powers," Lily stage-whispered. "She's got obsessive fangirl writing powers," Henry also whispered, and Emma laughed.

Regina was smirking, but she said "Henry, you might wanna get home. Lily, you too," she added. Both teens nodded. They waved to everybody else, Henry shouting "Bye moms!" As he went out the door.

"Such nice kids," Metatron commented.

"Go near them, and I'll incinerate you," Regina said, Emma nodding in agreement.

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 **A/N: I have literally no clue.**

 **I love you all!**

 **BYE ;3**


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